Friday, April 3, 2009

When God Speaks: "Micah Meets Optimus Prime" (Micah)

When God Speaks:“Micah Meets Optimus Prime”
April 3, 2009



On that great day," God says, "I will round up all the hurt and homeless, everyone I have bruised or banished. I will transform the battered into a company of the elite. I will make a strong nation out of the long lost, A showcase exhibit of God's rule in action, as I rule from Mount Zion, from here to eternity. "And you stragglers around Jerusalem, eking out a living in shantytowns: The glory that once was will be again. Jerusalem's daughter will be the kingdom center." Micah 4: 6-8


We can call it sleep deprivation (considering that it is 3:00am and I’m up writing this) but when I read this scripture, I started singing (and desired a bowl of Fruit Loops): Transformers! More than meets the eye! Autobots wage their battle to destroy the forces of the evil Decepticons! Transformers! Robots in disguise! Transformers! More than meets the eye!

Don’t laugh. That is the first- and only- thing that came in my head reading this portion of Micah. I thought about how Micah was assuring God’s people that He would transform them from hurt and empty into healed and whole. He was going to take them from victims to victors. And that’s the exact same thing that happened with the Autobots. For the first twenty minutes, Megatron and his crew would straight thrash Optimus Prime, Bumble Bee and the rest of the Autobots and then, they’d regroup, rethink their strategy and end up defeating the Decepticons. We can learn a lot from those Ford 150s turned heroes. Don’t believe me? This is going to be fuuuun!

We have more power than we (or the enemy) realize.
Did you ever notice how the theme song talked about the Autobots being “more than meets the eye” and “robots in disguise”? That meant there was something inside of them that not everyone could see. Let’s face it; they were beat up Camaros and pickup trucks. On the surface, if they made it up a hill, it was an accomplishment. But on the inside, they were machines well equipped to complete the task. That’s the same with you. People (maybe even you) are focusing on the outside: you’re not the prettiest (and ain’t that subjective); you’re not the smartest; you don’t have the qualifications; you don’t possess the stature. But on the inside, you are in possession of the greatest force in the world: the power of God! And along with that power comes favor, grace and mercy. You may not have the resume that enables you to get that job but guess what? You have it! Your grades may not have been “summa cum laude” status but you got the scholarship! The God in us confuses our enemy; he never understands how what he plans for us never succeeds. You’d think he’d get it by now, huh?

The power in us will always be tested and the test won’t be easy.
Despite the power Optimus Prime had and showcased (every week), Megatron always came up with a new attack; and each attack got stronger and more intense. Sometimes (more times than not), the attack would take Optimus back to the drawing board. And every week, without fail, little kids around the world would wonder how the Autobots were going to get out of this one. Though, Megatron would be victorious, the most important lesson was not realizing that he would be the overcomer but recognizing why he was being attacked. Megatron and the Autobots were responsible for keeping Earth safe. That’s a pretty big responsibility. Those with purpose will always be targeted. Maybe you’ve endured hurt from a friend, betrayal in a relationship, the loss of a job or home, or you’re feeling the brunt of this recession and your resources are becoming constrained. Now, if you’re a Believer, you already know you’re victorious but do you know why you’re being attacked? You’ve got something to give this world. Your reason for being is so impactful that the enemy has to work overtime to get you so frustrated about your current circumstances that you lose focus of the bigger picture: what you’ve been called to do. Don’t give him that much credit. God never said we wouldn’t tested but with Him, we pass with flying colors!

The powerful are special people.
I love how The Message Translation of this passage says that God will transform us into a company of the elite. Elite means chosen- a little better than the rest. You know what the Transformers were called? They were called an elite fighting force. Everybody couldn’t be a Transformer. Your 87 Honda Accord LX couldn’t kick it with Bumblebee. Optimus Prime was not about to let your deuce and a quarter be his apprentice. You had to be special and favored to be an Autobot. Oh how wonderful it is that God favors us! Because He’s chosen us, we get special treatment. We’re living when that sickness or accident should have killed us years ago. We’re enjoying the fruits of some things we didn’t labor for. People don’t understand it. They try to figure it out. They lost their job six weeks ago and are going crazy; you’ve been out of work two years and God’s still keeping you. His hand never leaves you because He can trust you with what He gives. The Autobots could be trusted with their power and responsibility. You can be trusted with your gift and your anointing. You may not dot every “i” and cross every “t” but God can depend on your heart and for that, He calls you away and sets you apart and you eat off the fat of the land.

I’m going to bed now. I’ll wait until later to eat those Fruit Loops! But it’s amazing what you can learn from a thirty minute show. I had the Transformers action figures, lunch box, posters, bed sheets (I went through a tomboy stage. Thank God I didn’t stay there) and played it with my cousins all the time growing up. I didn’t recognize how much power I was playing with back then. Shoot, I didn’t recognize how much power I’m joking around with now. Ohhh….but I got it and because I got it, watch out! I intend to possess everything meant for me and fight with all I have to never lose it. Will you? Autobots Unite!


©BirthRight, 2009

Monday, March 30, 2009

When God Speaks: "Displaced And Unnecessary Anger" (Jonah)

When God Speaks: “Displaced And Unnecessary Anger”
March 30, 2009



But Jonah just left. He went out of the city to the east and sat down in a sulk. He put together a makeshift shelter of leafy branches and sat there in the shade to see what would happen to the city. God arranged for a broad-leafed tree to spring up. It grew over Jonah to cool him off and get him out of his angry sulk. Jonah was pleased and enjoyed the shade. Life was looking up. But then God sent a worm. By dawn of the next day, the worm had bored into the shade tree and it withered away. The sun came up and God sent a hot, blistering wind from the east. The sun beat down on Jonah's head and he started to faint. He prayed to die: "I'm better off dead!" Then God said to Jonah, "What right do you have to get angry about this shade tree?" Jonah said, "Plenty of right. It's made me angry enough to die!" God said, "What's this? How is it that you can change your feelings from pleasure to anger overnight about a mere shade tree that you did nothing to get? You neither planted nor watered it. It grew up one night and died the next night. So, why can't I likewise change what I feel about Nineveh from anger to pleasure, this big city of more than 120,000 childlike people who don't yet know right from wrong, to say nothing of all the innocent animals?" –Jonah 4: 5-11

Jonah was angry. Here, he’d heard God’s command to go to Nineveh and preach, ignored it and went the other way, was thrown overboard and swallowed by a whale, spent three days in its belly before being thrown back up and ending up where he needed to be, only to have God decide to spare Nineveh from His destruction. And then the one thing that gave him comfort, God took away. Yea, Jonah was HOT! Jonah had gone through all of that and the people who should have been punished were getting off easily. Where was God’s justice in that? And instead of addressing the issue with God, Jonah started going off about a dead tree.

It’s the same with us. The ones who don’t study or come to class are getting the scholarships. The cheaters are the ones in relationships with lovers devoted to them. The schemers are getting the raises and the manipulators seem to be breezing through life. It’s just not fair. Funny thing is- Jonah wasn’t angry at that shade tree. He was upset with God, just as we sometimes are. We’re saying “God, I’m living right. I’m going to church. I’m praying. I’m paying my tithes. I’m repenting. I’m treating people the way I want to be treated and the way you want me to treat them. So why are the ones doing the total opposite seeing more of your mercy than me? Why did they get accepted? Why did they get the promotion? Why did they get that opportunity? Why did they get the house? Why did they get the car? Why?” And the beauty about God is that He showed Jonah and shows us just how crazy that thought process is. The same God whose shown us compassion was now the target of our frustration after showing it to others. Isn’t that sad?

God takes us through things to refine His will in our lives but, from the outside looking in, it seems that He doesn’t take others through half of the things He takes us. There’s no additional chapter of Jonah so we don’t really know how he responded after God “set him straight”. But I hope it was with an act of repentance. Sometimes, I have seen what I considered to be a “blessing” for “unjust people” that I “a righteous one” should enjoy. What a conceited thought! The sun and God’s love shines on us all. Just as He used Jonah’s presence in Nineveh to bring His children back to Him, God can use anything to get His children to recognize where their help comes from- even an “unmerited blessing”. I don’t know about you but the wiser I get (getting older doesn’t always equate with wisdom. I know I’m not the only one who knows a couple of old fools), I appreciate God’s compassion on me and others more. This is, sometimes, a hard life to live and who wouldn’t appreciate a break every now and then? Stop being angry at God for giving Himself to those you think don’t deserve it and start thanking Him for giving Himself for you when you didn’t deserve it…and never will. God is compassionate, loving, just and righteous to us all; and isn’t that why we love Him? I thought so.



©BirthRight, 2009


Tuesday, March 24, 2009

When God Speaks: "Necessary Plateaus and Road Trips *TSU Edition* (Obadiah)

When God Speaks:“Necessary Plateaus and Road Trips (TSU Edition)
March 24, 2009


You thought you were so great, perched high among the rocks, king of the mountain, thinking to yourself, 'Nobody can get to me! Nobody can touch me!' Think again. Even if, like an eagle, you hang out on a high cliff-face, Even if you build your nest in the stars, I'll bring you down to earth." God's sure Word. –Obadiah: 3-4

Two hours after my initial departure time on Friday, I arrived at Damon’s. We’re heading to Nashville where I was to issue a charge to student leaders at my alma mater. I could have flown; I would’ve been flying the friendly skies for two hours before I touched down “in the land of golden sunshine.” However, I decided to drive. It had been a while since the road and I communicated for a significant length of time. But I needed a partner- there was no way I could have (or wanted to) tackled those miles by myself. So a great friend and fellow alum got in the car with me and we headed out of North Carolina and into Tennessee. And boy did I need this trip! Have there ever been times where you needed to get away- for your own sanity? You needed to ask God some questions in surroundings that are not consistent with your everyday circumstances? You needed to laugh with a friend to know that everything is going to be okay…or be reminded that it already was? I was there!

There are times when everything is going well for us. Our jobs are stable and secure. Our relationships are healthy and whole. Our energy is optimal and productive. Our faith is strong and intentional. We’re doing fine. In these times, it can become so easy for us to lose sight of what (or who rather) is allowing these successes. So we cruise along, believing we are invincible or believing that specific scenarios won’t play out in our lives, and then BAM! It hits us; we’re slowed down. We’re not moving. We’ve been in the same position for what seems like forever and other people are getting the promotions. We make four steps forward in the quest to build the legacy that our kids will stand on and then the co-laborer does something, breaks our heart and sets us back six steps. We’ve been working out, getting in shape, losing consistent pounds each week and now haven’t lost anything in a month. We’ve desired and longed for this breakthrough but it has yet to materialize and now we feel forgotten. We have hit, what one of the panelists identified Saturday at the conference as, a plateau.

In a plateau, there’s little to no change and that’s what can become the most frustrating. However, as the panelist, there is a way to get out of them. You must eliminate excuses, recognize what’s fundamentally causing the plateau and approach it correctly. As he continued to deliver his point, he said sometimes we’re in a plateau because we’ve allowed the negative things said about us to become what we believe and, consequently, we lose momentum. And then, there are other times where God is trying to get us to shift our focus and priorities back on Him and what He wants us to do. Immediately after Mr. Davis from Cummings International said that, I laughed and said “Okay, God. I hear you.” Whether it’s a failed relationship, lost job, uncomfortable situation or all of the above, God is trying to get our attention. Immobility should force you to desire to be mobile again and, spiritually, that will come through conversations with the Father regarding His strategy. He does know best after all. I thought I was going to ride up to Nashville, talk to the “kids” (because I learned this weekend that the Class of 2004 is officially an old one), eat some Buffalo Express, hang with my friends, go to Born Again and relax. I am so thankful that God had other plans. The necessity of this trip helped to reveal lessons that are paramount to the next levels of my purpose and destiny. When He does a thing, He does it well.

One hour after my initial departure time on Sunday, I arrived at Damon’s (being on time is one of my New Year’s Commitments…be patient, it’s only March). We were heading back home. Having a day to fully process this trip and all it means, there will be more shared as this week progresses. But for now, embrace the fact that plateaus aren’t forever. Figure out why you are there and what you need to do to leave. Before I headed for Nashville, my mother said “You’re going there for something and I hope you get whatever it is.” When I was able to tell her “Ma- I got it”, I felt something. I was moving again.

©BirthRight, 2009

Friday, March 13, 2009

When God Speaks: "The Weight of the Call" (Amos)

When God Speaks: “The Weight of the Call”
March 13, 2009


"Out of all the families on earth, I picked you. Therefore, because of your special calling, I'm holding you responsible for all your sins." –Amos 3:2


Yea, I read the verse twice too; God is not a game! Amos was delivering the message of God to the Children of Israel. He began by telling them that God was calling them into account- every family He delivered from Egypt would be made accountable for their actions. He’d given them a second chance. God took them from bondage and enabled them to start over and they were still acting crazy. He told them that because of their “special calling” (the work He placed in them to complete), He was going to hold them responsible for everything they did. He does the same to us, too. My mom and I were talking the other day about this new movement where people think they can do whatever they want without consequence. Knowing my mother, I also knew she was using it as an opportunity to illustrate to me what I was doing that she wasn’t necessarily a fan of (I hear it’s a gift that only comes with motherhood). She said to me “Candice, it boils down to one question: Do you want to God to use you or not? If you answer yes, then you have to be willing to die in every way that’s necessarily to live for Him and if you answer no, you have to be ready to die and know you’re not going to live at all.” Say it again, Mama!

The fact remains that, because we each know (or have some idea of) where God is taking or wants to take us, we also know that the responsibility of that level will require a surrender in us that could render our current lifestyles nonexistent. The surface is: Because God called me to do a specific work, I need to stop drinking, I need to stop letting him like it without putting a ring on it, I need to stop cursing, I need to stop half paying my tithes. That’s the easy “to-do” list. The harder things are: Because God called me to do a specific work, I need to stop doubting that I can do it, I need to stop becoming frustrated when what I want to do doesn’t work, I need to stop looking for excuses to continue doing the unproductive, I need to stop believing in everyone else and give myself some of that faith. These are all things that God will hold us accountable for when we fail to recognize what we can’t do for Him without Him. The weight of our call is heavy and we are weak; but isn’t His strength made perfect right then? Riiight.

I will be the first to admit that walking in the call God has spoken over your life is difficult, whether you’re at the stage where you first recognize it or have been travelling down the road for a minute. But what I do know is that He gives us specific and deliberate grace to complete every assignment- and since He gave us the assignments, He’s got our backs. Don’t be fooled. The ones “called” aren’t just the preachers. God’s called the teachers, attorneys, physicians, counselors, bankers, politicians, artists, engineers, mechanics, marketing strategists, barbers, stylists, musicians, authors, trainers, husbands, wives, children- He’s called us all to do a work that only we can do that will benefit the kingdom greatly. And because of that work, there are certain things we know we can’t do. It’s hard (believe me…I know how hard it is) and every day, we don’t hit the mark. But don’t stop trying to; that’s when we fail and God becomes displeased. Recognize your call and the power within you to do it. You can do it, you know. You really can. He wouldn’t have given it to you if you couldn’t.

Wow. That just made me smile. And I know you are, too.

©BirthRight, 2009

Monday, March 9, 2009

When God Speaks: Redeem The Time (Joel)

When God Speaks: “Redeem The Time”
February 21, 2009


"I'll make up for the years of the locust, the great locust devastation-Locusts savage, locusts deadly, fierce locusts, locusts of doom, that great locust invasion I sent your way.You'll eat your fill of good food. You'll be full of praises to your God, the God who has set you back on your heels in wonder. Never again will my people be despised. You'll know without question that I'm in the thick of life with Israel, That I'm your God, yes, your God, the one and only real God. Never again will my people be despised.” –Joel 2: 25-27

When you get a chance, read the entire second chapter of the Book of Joel. God had brought destruction on Israel and they didn’t know what to do. Over and over again, His instructions to them were clear: REPENT AND COME BACK TO ME! And that’s exactly what they did. All of the Children of Israel set aside a day of fasting and repentance to God for their actions. They were sincere in their request for forgiveness; and God went to work on their behalf. He restored their land and all their belongings and gave them the best of what He had for them. But He also did something else, particularly magnificent, for them: God made up for the years they lost!

Have you ever looked at something you’ve done and been disappointed that you can’t get that time back. Maybe you went to school and majored in something you wanted to major in and not what God said. Now you’re ready to do God’s will for your life but the thought of having to go back to school and take a completely different set of courses is stopping you. Maybe you were in a relationship that you know was not in God’s perfect will for your life. The relationship is over and you’re looking at all the time you’ve wasted. You’ve even contemplated going back to it because it’s easier to stay there than to wait, patiently, on God’s promise for your life. Maybe you’ve ran from the call that God’s placed on your life and now you’re ready to say yes but have become disappointed with all the years you’ve spent running. Fear not, beautiful people. God can and will redeem the time.

The beauty in the Savior we life for is that His correction is never truly about punishment. If it were, we would have never been introduced to grace and mercy. No, God’s correction is about charting us back on the right path for His glory. Don’t concern yourself with the classes you’ll have to take. Don’t worry about the fact that you’ll have to reemerge into life “single”. No sleep should be lost over how many years you could have been operating in God’s call for your life. You’ve given yourself to Him and He will give you all of those years back and then some. Sit back and thank Him for that. The Devil really thought he was doing something, didn’t he? Little did he know you were getting all that time back and had the wisdom, this time around, to use it the way you were supposed to in the beginning. My, how time flies when you’re living right!


©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: Sailing...And Every Other Thing God Uses To Keep Us On Track (Hosea)

When God Speaks: “Sailing...And Every Other Thing God Uses To Keep Us On Track”
March 10, 2009


If you want to live well, make sure you understand all of this. If you know what's good for you, you'll learn this inside and out. God's paths get you where you want to go. Right-living people walk them easily; wrong-living people are always tripping and stumbling. –Hosea 14:9

It's not far down to paradise/ At least it's not for me/ And if the wind is right you can sail awayAnd find tranquility/ The canvas can do miracles/ Just you wait and see/ Believe me
Sailing/ Takes me away/ To where I've always heard it could be/ Just a dream and the wind to carry me/ And soon I will be free

I will be honest; when I read this passage, Christopher Cross’ “Sailing” was the first thing that popped in my head. I began to sing it and sway from side to side like I do every time I hear or think about that song. To me, it is one of the most beautiful songs ever written. Cross said that he wrote it because, as a teenager, he and his friends would resort to sailing to stay out of trouble and escape life’s trials and tribulations. Being in the midst of God’s creation kept him close to the Father and His plan for his life. Had he not gone sailing as a child, he may have never been all that God wanted him to be and the world may have never heard the beauty that is “Sailing”. Now, I completely understand why I thought of that song as I read this passage.

God has a plan for all of us. Okay; and how many times have you heard that? Exactly. He has a plan for us: this we know. Sometimes it’s what that plan actually is that can perplex us. Are we supposed to be working where we’re working or is God telling us to step out and do a new venture? Is God calling us to sow into the life of someone and we don’t necessarily understand why? Is this path requiring a level that we’ve not yet reached or are afraid to? Do we really want to, right now, let go of what we know we have to let go of to get where we need to go? Does God plan require that we walk away from a love we believed would be forever? All of these are valid questions. I once was rushing trying to get the answers to them and my brother Robert told me plainly “Sis, you’re not that special. You probably won’t ever get the answers but you just keep living anyway.” For a moment, his “take it or leave it” honesty made me mad but I got what he was trying to get me to understand.

If I am in the hand of God, He has me. No man put me there and no man can take me out of it. No adverse circumstance can affect the Lord’s will for my life because everything has to be permitted by Him. He gives permission to my life. Wow. God permits me to live. How can we not yield to such power? What I like about this passage is that it says “Right-living people walk them (God’s path) easily.” Don’t be confused. This doesn’t mean that the Elect of us won’t have problems; we do and they will continue. But what this means is that we don’t frustrate, worry, cold calculate, cry or fear going through them. We walk (easily, might I add) through life because we understand that God has mapped it out to our benefit. That phone call out of the blue brought you closer to purpose. That school acceptance letter pushed you a little further into destiny. The ability to love yourself more and walk into every promise spoken over your life helped make things clearer. And that sailing trip back in the day allowed you to appreciate it all.


©BirthRight, 2009

Monday, March 2, 2009

When God Speaks: The Trap They Set For You Was Actually For Them (Daniel)

When God Speaks:“The Trap They Set For You Was Actually For Them”
March 2, 2009



Because the king was in such a hurry and the furnace was so hot, flames from the furnace killed the men who carried Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego to it, while the fire raged around Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. Nebuchadnezzar went to the door of the roaring furnace and called in, "Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, servants of the High God, come out here!" Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego walked out of the fire. All the important people, the government leaders and king's counselors, gathered around to examine them and discovered that the fire hadn't so much as touched the three men—not a hair singed, not a scorch mark on their clothes, not even the smell of fire on them! – Daniel 3: 22, 26-27


You are sooo favored. God really has His hand on your life. The plans He has for you will change the destiny of your family. The Lord desires for you, specifically, to carry out His will in a way that many will not appreciate. These, my friend, are your haters. They are those who won’t understand why God is using you the way He is. They’re upset because you benefit greatly from grace and mercy. It makes them sick that you bow to no will other than God’s. So what do they do? They set a trap and wait to watch you fall. But what’s most comedic about a hater is that the best ones never reveal themselves that way, at first.

Just in the chapter before, King Nebuchadnezzar promoted Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego as a result of Daniel interpreting his dream. He admired them and their God. However, when he got full of himself and built a false god for the people to worship, he became enraged when his three friends did not. Isn’t it amazing how haters, who disguise themselves as friends, get upset when you don’t do what they think you should? Have you noticed how they become slightly enraged when you continue to hold the standard they let go of a long time ago? You, for them, become a target. At all costs, they have to prove that you aren’t who you say you are or punish you for your strength. King Nebuchadnezzar got so angry with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego for disobeying him that he wanted them to pay in the worst way; he had the furnace turned up seven times hotter than normal. Now, we all know the story that God covered the three Hebrew boys and they were not harmed. But did you check what happened to the men who were in charge of their fate? They were the ones killed by the furnace. Talk about your enemies coming to eat of your flesh and stumbling and falling!

They may have tried to take your job but they ended up being the one fired. They may have even lied on you but, in the end, were exposed as the liar. Remember, the weapons form but they don’t prosper. If you’re living right and submitting to the authority of God, all your haters can do is hate. They don’t stop anything; they only aid in their own destruction. Some of you may have some Nebuchadnezzars in your life right now. They say you won’t finish school. They say you won’t start that business. They say you won’t get married. They say you won’t amount to much. They say who you are right now is all you’ll ever be. Don’t sweat it. Sit back and relax. With each word, they seal their own fate.

God’s got you. Yes He does.


©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: In Spite Of You

When God Speaks:“In Spite of You”
February 19, 2009


"Therefore, tell Israel, 'Message of God, the Master: I'm not doing this for you, Israel. I'm doing it for me, to save my character, my holy name, which you've blackened in every country where you've gone. I'm going to put my great and holy name on display, the name that has been ruined in so many countries, the name that you blackened wherever you went. Then the nations will realize who I really am, that I am God, when I show my holiness through you so that they can see it with their own eyes. "'For here's what I'm going to do: I'm going to take you out of these countries, gather you from all over, and bring you back to your own land. I'll pour pure water over you and scrub you clean. I'll give you a new heart, put a new spirit in you. I'll remove the stone heart from your body and replace it with a heart that's God-willed, not self-willed. I'll put my Spirit in you and make it possible for you to do what I tell you and live by my commands. You'll once again live in the land I gave your ancestors. You'll be my people! I'll be your God!” –Ezekiel 36: 22-28


I have a great respect for Ezekiel; I really do. He had to deliver God’s word to a people who were trippin’. Israel, the chosen ones, had lost their minds! They did what they wanted to do, lived how they wanted to live, said what they wanted to say and thought how they wanted to think. Israel became the brunt of harsh jokes and the target of attacks. And all the while people were saying “Wait…aren’t those the Israelites? Those are God’s people acting like that? You’ve got to be kidding me!” Then God got fed up; He became tired of His name being trampled. He had enough of people believing that serving Him meant living any way they pleased. So what did He do? He chose to restore Israel- not for their benefit. He restored Israel for HIS glory so that those who believed Israel’s way of life was synonymous with that of the way of the Lord would know otherwise. How blessed are we when God uses us despite of who we are and what we’ve done?

There are some benefits of being used by God for His glory. The Israelites got their land restored, their things back, a new heart and spirit that would yield to the Master’s work. We get some things, as well. Of course we get those tangible blessings that people can see: we get a house; we could a car; we get a job; we get stable relationships; we get those things that are evidence of God’s work in our lives. But we also get those things that manifest inwardly. When God uses us, He places within us a desire to live solely for Him. We read His word more. We talk to Him more. We listen to Him more. We recognize the need to mold our lives in a way that people can say “Wow! They belong to God and you can tell it, too!”

Sunday, I spent the evening with my extended family. It’s a group of 15 of us and several of us hung out at Sherrod and Lisa’s house. June 30 will make two years they’ve been married. They are one of the best representations of allowing God to use you and honoring His use. They have a beautiful home, blessings abound and they are about to embark on a new chapter of God’s purpose for their family. But Sherrod and Lisa also have the favor and grace of God. If you ask them their secret, they’ll tell you it is simply: God. They are not perfect; none of us are. But The Lord uses them to show that a righteous life is the only one to live. He can use us all- if He chooses. And aren’t you glad He does?


©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: From Gs To Gents- A Love Story (Lamentations)

When God Speaks:“From Gs to Gents: A Love Story”
February 13, 2009


I'll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness, the taste of ashes, the poison I've swallowed.I remember it all—oh, how well I remember- the feeling of hitting the bottom.But there's one other thing I remember, and remembering, I keep a grip on hope:God's loyal love couldn't have run out, his merciful love couldn't have dried up.They're created new every morning. How great your faithfulness!I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over). He's all I've got left. –Lamentations 3: 19-24



There’s a show that comes on MTV called “From Gs to Gents”. The premise of this show is to take men who’ve not necessarily portrayed the most positive images (gangsters or Gs) and transform them into educated, cultured and refined gentlemen. The transformation, over the 12 or so weeks of the show, is sometimes difficult to watch. To see grown men emerging from their insecurities to become the best they can be takes a toll, not only on them but, the supporter as well. Most of my friends, well the female faction, don’t like this show. A few of them asked me “Are these real Gs on the show? I don’t want to watch any fake ones.” My response remained the same: “I’m not so concerned with whether they were real gangsters before as I am excited about the gentlemen they will become.” Yea and Amen.

I’ve written several pieces solely dedicated to encouraging African-American men. But more than any other time they’ve been heavily on my heart this week. Maybe it’s because it’s Valentine’s Day Season and society would lead them to believe if they can’t afford a Harry Winston diamond, they’re worthless. Maybe it’s because I’ve seen the strongest of men become weakened by constant attacks on their integrity and character assassination attempts. Maybe it’s because I’ve witnessed brothers try and try and try and try (and try and try and try) but are knocked down and expected to get back up with the wind still out of them. And who are they called to love? Us. Women who would rather watch episodes of “The Flavor of Love”, “Real Chance at Love” (and any other ignorant dating show) that exhorts a woman’s behind over her inner beauty than a show where African-American men are trying to equip themselves with the tools necessary to better take care of them and us. That’s a lot of pressure. Too much pressure. So Kings, if you don’t hear it today or tomorrow, let me be the first to say:

Your efforts don’t go unnoticed.You are where you are supposed to be.Hard work is rewarded.You are loved beyond measure.Even if you have nothing, you have God’s love.That is MORE than enough!

Here’s my Valentine’s Day gift to you; enjoy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tho49trb4iE

I heard Tyler Perry (read up on his life story when you get a chance…powerful) say this week that Jesus didn’t always have a place to sleep but He always had a place to pray. I know that’s right! You may not have the money tomorrow. You may not be able to make those big plans come to fruition. You may not be able to see your way right now. But you’re always one “In Jesus’ name, Amen” away from the beauty and greatness in life.

Happy Valentine’s Day, Gentlemen.

©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: Growing Wild- A Tale of Two Gardeners (Jeremiah)

When God Speaks:“Growing Wild- A Tale of Two Gardeners”
February 4, 2008



Go down the rows of vineyards and rip out the vines, but not all of them. Leave a few. Prune back those vines! That growth didn't come from God! – Jeremiah 5: 10


Today, I began three days of prayer and fasting. A dear sister in ministry sent out this invitation that was extended by her brother, who lives in South Africa. In agreement with the Spirit in Shellie and her brother (because it’s the same one in me), I prayed and submitted to this “spiritual detox”. It was, to say the least, quite timely. I’d just had several conversations with people about the questions we needed answers to and most, if not all, of them can only come through the discipline and clarity of a fast. While I was excited for anyone who participated in this, I sent a few personal requests to those people that I knew were trying to understand the “whys and hows”- just like me. Some accepted the call; some did not. But we forged together anyway, linking with people across this world- people we will never see- desperately seeking the face of God.

And then today came. And boy, did it come! One of the requirements of this time was to get a journal, write your questions in black or blue ink and God’s responses in red. Throughout today, I’ve appreciated seeing more red than black because that means I’m listening. I am hearing what He’s saying to me. This evening was our time to spend in the book of Jeremiah. Sending encouraging text messages all day to each other, I sent my fellow fasters the hilarious truth: God is slick going OFF on me through Jeremiah! Now to be fair, God showed me some beautiful things about my destiny and preparation through this book, but He also showed me that compromise in ANY area of my life is no longer an option. As I continued to read and listen, He spoke frankly: Candice, everything you’re saying came from me really didn’t.


Yea, I know. Deep, huh? What God showed me was that for a very long time I’d gone around doing what I felt because I believed that was a part of my liberty, under the auspices of “only living one life” and having “no regrets”. I called because I wanted to. I texted because it was my phone. I knocked on the door because it was my life. It didn’t matter that twenty minutes after I called, I was wondering why I did it. The fact that I would have immediate regret after hitting “send” was of no consequence. And honestly who really cared that a day after knocking on the door, I was laying on the altar crying? I’d become a woman and women acknowledge and exercise their emotions, right? Wrong. There is a difference between submitting to the Spirit and catering to the flesh. Through God’s chastisement of Israel, I understood that, if not nurtured properly, something good can become bad. Milk will spoil if you don’t refrigerate it. Israel was God’s chosen and He loved them. In Him, they grew and prospered. But they also left Him and matured in ways that were not of Him. Just because you’re growing doesn’t mean you’re growing correctly. Take time to assess your soil. Are you getting enough sunlight? Do you get watered daily? It’s easy, very easy, to become cultivated by something that didn’t plant you. Stay on guard. That’s the only you can ensure that when you’re plucked, you’re put in a vase and not in the trash.
©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: It Had To Die So You Could See Him (Isaiah)

When God Speaks:“It Had To Die So You Could See Him”
February 1, 2009



In the year that king Uzziah died I saw also the LORD sitting upon a throne, high and lifted up, and his train filled the temple.- Isaiah 6:1


In all the times that you’ve read or heard this passage, have you ever wondered who King Uzziah was? Honestly, I never did. I just marveled how Isaiah described God’s majesty. But tonight, as I was reading this passage, I asked for the very first time: “Who was King Uzziah?” My research took me to several concordances and research sites that I frequent to answer my questions and I learned some quite interesting facts about him. His story begins in II Chronicles when, at the age of 16, he became the king of Israel after his father was killed. Though he helped restore Israel to its former glory, Uzziah later got arrogant. He asserted himself higher than God in worship and disobeyed the laws He set forth. When the elders confronted him, Uzziah remained firm in his defiance. God afflicted Uzziah with leprosy as a consequence and he spent the rest of his life in seclusion; his son served as king in his absence. While Uzziah was “away”, he was still king and Israel was under the submission of a king who violated God’s command and refused to accept his responsibility. When he died, it was as if Israel was freed again. Isaiah saw God and His restoration when King Uzziah died. And it is the same with us. Some things have to lose life in order for us to see God and live for Him.

It was that relationship you thought would last forever that God ended. It was that job you knew was perfect that God sent the pink slip. It was your business that you believed was flourishing that God closed. It was your plans that you thought made sense that God showed to be senseless. It had to die. It had to cease. It had to end so that you could refocus on Him. Through it, He showed you that only in Him and through Him will true love come and last. Through it, He showed that He -not your boss- supplies all your needs. Through it, He showed that His purpose is more successful than your agenda. Through it, He showed that His plans for your life are the most bountiful. Some of us are crying and upset over what God took. Why? When we had it, we were dying in our salvation. Now that it’s gone, we’re killing our flesh. Which is more beneficial?

I’m understanding and appreciating death, in the spiritual and natural, more than I ever did before. The death is just as important as the life. When something dies, it has served its purpose. It can no longer grow and there are no more changes left to be made. The death has signaled the finality of it all. We cannot will a person back to life no more than we can a dead relationship, career, business or belief. When it is over, we are to look back on the memories and continue our growth and development, allowing the lessons learned from the life and death to make us better. Let go of the dead thing. The fact that you are still living is proof enough that God has more life and prosperity coming your way. Isaiah saw God after Uzziah died because he knew that the Lord was there. He acknowledged that God was using that opportunity to get Isaiah to see Him and oh, what a sight!! Recognize that despite the pain, frustration and disappointment- whatever it was had to come to an end so that God could fulfill His work - that beautiful, amazing, life changing, powerful work- in you!


©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: A $40 Valentine's Day Teddy Bear That's Fireproof (Song of Solomon)

When God Speaks:
"A $40.00 Valentine's Day Teddy Bear That's Fireproof"
January 27, 2009



The Man: A lotus blossoming in a swamp of weeds- that's my dear friend among the girls in the village.
The Woman: As an apricot tree stands out in the forest, my lover stands above the young men in town. All I want is to sit in his shade, to taste and savor his delicious love. He took me home with him for a festive meal, but his eyes feasted on me! Oh! Give me something refreshing to eat—and quickly! Apricots, raisins—anything. I'm about to faint with love! His left hand cradles my head, and his right arm encircles my waist! Oh, let me warn you, sisters in Jerusalem, by the gazelles, yes, by all the wild deer: Don't excite love, don't stir it up, until the time is ripe—and you're ready. –Song of Solomon 2: 2-7


When I tell you I love Song of Solomon, I love Song of Solomon! Sure the entire book is symbolic of Christ's love for us. But it also proves that God loves romance, intimacy and (as my grandma Sarah would say) "good lovin" in the right context, which we all know to be marriage. But some of us aren't married yet. And everywhere we go, we're reminded of that. Is it me or did Walmart just go from reminding some of us that we had no one special for Christmas to throwing in our faces that there's no boo around to spoil us on Valentine's Day? It is beyond me why my favorite pastime decided to devote five aisles of premium retail space to one day. But then I saw it. It was a big light brown teddy bear with pink paws, a pink heart and I wanted it. And then I saw the price. $40.00! I continued my shopping but I came back to that bear twice. Leaving the store, I resolved that I was going to have that bear- eventually.

I'd waited months for today; the movie Fireproof was released on DVD. What I loved most was the tagline: Never leave your partner behind, especially in a fire. We are/were all looking for someone to love and someone to love us. It gives life meaning. But are we truly doing it the way we're supposed to? The father in Fireproof told his son that he couldn't love his wife because he was incapable of giving something he didn't have. Is that not powerful? How many people are in relationships trying to give what they are without? It will never work. You can't give love if you don't have it. You can't give happiness if you don't have it. Because some people are so desperate to be loved, they will accept anything. You can't be fireproof in a house built on flames.

That's why I love this passage. They were in love but built their foundation on something more lasting. Apparently, according to these divorce rates, people fall in and out of love. But did you notice how Mr. Right referred to his baby as his friend and sistergirl said her man stood above all the men in town? I was once told that love can't exist without friendship and respect. While I agree, I now understand that if I don't know who I am, I don't know what love truly is. If God has created me for greatness, why would I settle for mediocre? If I learned that peace is my inheritance, why would I adopt drama? That is not love. The movie ended with a song that spoke words so true: Love is not a fight but it's something worth fighting for. Many of us have been scarred by relationships that were wrong for us. We tried to make them right. We tried to make them work. But they were not in God's ultimate plan for our lives. But let this not blind us to the beauty that is love. Our Father has created a feeling, an emotion, an action, a commitment so wondrous that He has allowed someone to be created that He speaks to solely for our benefit. If that isn't love, what is? I may not get that $40 teddy bear in a few weeks but today, I got something better. I received a greater appreciation for God and what I know He's going to bring me. And I love Him and him more for it. :-)

To every couple I know (married, engaged or dating-and you know God called you two together), I implore you not only to purchase this movie but also complete the Love Dare that compliments it. May you never be afraid of the Kingdom work that will be accomplished because of your union. Demons tremble because you walk boldly in this realm of your purpose. Continue to keep them afraid.


Love is not a place to come and go as we please.
It's a house we enter in and then commit to never leave.
So lock the door behind you and throw away the key.
Work it out together; let it bring us to our knees.
Love is a shelter in a raging storm.
Love is peace in the middle of a war.
And if we try to leave, may God send angels to guard the door.
No, love is not a fight but it's something worth fighting for.
-"Love Is Not A Fight", Warren Barfield
©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: Why Time Can't Be Disrespected (Ecclesiastes)

When God Speaks:"Why Time Can't Be Disrespected"
January 26, 2009



There's an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth. –Ecclesiastes 3: 1
"The only reason for time is so that everything doesn't happen at once." -Albert Einstein


It has been 129 days since my first love's life was taken. In the days immediately following finding out he was gone, maneuvering through life was a chore. I combined one of my favorite scriptures (Ecclesiastes 3:11) and one of my favorite quotes by Roman philosopher Seneca to create what became my daily mantra: He has made everything beautiful in its time and time heals what reason cannot." I said that every day, thinking the pain would magically disappear and I would have an understanding as to why this tragedy occurred. That didn't happen. And so I attempted to occupy myself with some of everything to keep from thinking about it. While Dimera and I were not dating when he left this world, we'd spent the greater part of eight years together. I felt like I had to masquerade my grief to make everyone else comfortable. Exasperated, I had a conversation with one of my best friends. Delishia said, simply, that what I needed was time and there was no substitution for it. She has never been so right.


We rush things too much sometimes, desiring the immediacy of life. We get mad because a red light lasts too long. If we're in a store and we see a line at a register, we begin looking for another one or contemplate leaving the store altogether. We don't like to wait. Why? Time is necessary. It allows us to regroup and reposition ourselves for what is to come. I realized that by not allowing myself to process losing Dimera and heal from it, I disrespected time. Have you ever done that? Did you stop going to school because it was taking too long to finish? Have you gone from one relationship straight into another one? Have you ever rushed anything and then had to go back and redo it all? There are lessons that can only be learned through the patience of everything. Tears make sense when you allow them to flow. When given space, things don't seem so crowded. When you work for what you have and take the time to appreciate it, happiness abounds.


It has been 129 days since my first love's life was taken. There are times when I think of him and laugh uncontrollably. And then, there are times when I think of him and the tears flow. There are days when I am happy. There are days when I am sad. There are days when I am confused. There are days when I am angry. There are days when I can't even find a word to articulate what I'm feeling. But thank God that there are days. His will is perfect; it is matchless and it includes time. I will grow in it. I will grow through it. But I will never take advantage of it again because it deserves my utmost and enduring respect. And yours too.

©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: Why God Doesn't Appreciate Your Drug Money Offering or Glory In Your Negative Account Balance (Proverbs)

When God Speaks:"Why God Doesn't Appreciate Your Drug Money Offering Or Glory In Your Negative Account Balance"
January 7, 2009



Honor the Lord with your capital and sufficiency [from righteous labors] and with the first fruits of all your income; so shall your storage places be filled with plenty, and your vats shall be overflowing with new wine.–Proverbs 3:9-10

I believe that at the beginning of any new year, an assessment should take place. As you resolve to do better this time, it's always important to analyze why you didn't do so well the last time. Remember, we're in the Year of Release and Manifestation (Application and Cultivation, for me) and if we truly want the greatness God has stored up for us, some areas need lots of work. And for some of us- that area is our finances.

Now, this isn't a "Why You Should Tithe" message. The lowliest of sinners understands that requirement. On the matter of tithing, I will just say this: if you aren't, START! It may not have caught up to you yet, but God will get what's owed to Him and when He does (ooohwee), you'll wish you just cut that 10% check each pay period. Moving on. No- this isn't about tithing as much as it is about the spirit with which we get and spend our money.

Notice what the first half of the scripture says: Honor the Lord with your capital and sufficiency [from your righteous labors]. Hmm….wonder why God wanted that emphasized? Probably because He didn't want the local drug dealer thinking that paying his tithes absolved his wrong. Or maybe He hoped the cutthroat businessman would realize that giving to the seed offering didn't please God anymore than cheating workers out of rightful wages did. Understand that because all we do is supposed to bring God glory, it would stand to reason that He would not welcome an offering made from that which didn't please Him. You may not work for the church or for some internationally recognized nonprofit agency, but you provide a service and it should be one that will uplift a soul and not diminish it. God will honor the offering of a waitress making $2/hour that brightened the day of her customers more than He will a teacher who's just there for a check and not the growth and development of her students.

I have learned that I just don't honor God through earning it the right way and giving Him 10%, I also honor Him in how I spend the other 90. As an only child and college student who appreciated a $500 monthly allowance and Visa credit card that mysteriously (thanks, Mom) kept a $0 balance despite my overspending, I never knew what it meant to budget. If I my account saw red, I just picked up the phone, called home, cried, listened to my mother's lecture, went to sleep and woke to a very black balance. But as I get older, I understand that not budgeting and overspending shows God that I lack discipline. It tells Him that I have no regards for the restraints He puts on my life and that I know more than He does. After all, I really needed that 40th pair of jeans and that quick weekend getaway was necessary to my sanity. Who cares if I have to spend a week and a half in the hole to pay for it? Yea right. If we believe that God gives us everything we need (and He does), what right do we have to squander it on our wants? Honor the Lord in how you get it, give it and spend it and He'll keep the luxuries coming and those overdraft charges at bay.

©BirthRight, 2009

Here are a few FREE financial health sites that are beneficial:
http://www.crown.org/ (A Financial Empowerment Ministry)


http://www.smartypig.com/ (Set up savings accounts for specific items or activities- for instance, a new pair of shoes or an annual girl's trip)

http://www.creditkarma.com/ (Track your credit score and anticipate its changes based on your actions)

http://www.bankrate.com/ (Compare rates on mortgages, other loans and money market accounts)

When God Speaks: A Self Esteem Boost For Everyone God Created

When God Speaks:"A Self Esteem Boost For Everyone God Created"
January 16, 2009


"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." –Psalm 139:14


Beautiful People,


I was convinced that the next piece I would send to you would be one somehow connected to the Inauguration. And while I know I will be sending something on Tuesday, this one needed an immediate release. When you recognize the gift God has placed in you, sensitivity will always be there. More specifically- you will cherish the moments and opportunities that He allows you to use your gift to bless His people. Today, for me, is no exception. I woke up this morning and I realized something: I woke up this morning! Never (again) taking that aspect of grace and mercy for granted, I began to thank God for allowing me to see another day. As my Master and I communed, one song flowed from my lips: "I am not forgotten. I am not forgotten. I am not forgotten. God knows my name." As I tapped my feet and clapped my hands, I continued Israel and New Breed's joyous declaration: "I will praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made!"


Now as a child, I've read and recited that verse too many times to count. But I just paid attention to it this morning and to get a better understanding, I read the entire psalm for context. David was praising God for always being there, regardless of the circumstance. He also marveled at how well God knew him to create him the way He did. While I understood all of that, I still had trouble with the "fearfully made" part- so I went to the dictionary. Merriam-Webster suggests that "fearfully" means there is an anticipation or exception of a bad or evil encounter. So if I am "fearfully made", does that mean God specifically created me because He expected that some not so positive things would happen in my life and He wanted to ensure that I overcame them? Why yes- it does!


The day before my birthday, Will Smith was on a Charlotte radio station promoting his latest film Seven Pounds. When asked why he selected the movie and subsequent others (I Am Legend, Hancock and The Pursuit of Happyness), he said he'd become fascinated with telling the story of people whose lives didn't turn out the way they planned. He said he wanted to answer the question: "is this it or will Spring come after Winter like it always has?" Wow. What I'm wise enough to know is that while I talk about "preparing for purpose" and ask if you've "chased destiny today", we all struggle with insecurities that make it seem almost impossible. Whether it's a failed relationship, unsuccessfully completing your education, being slothful, feeling inferior, we all have a "Winter" but thank God for the "Spring"! Can you imagine God creating you to overcome everything that you thought would destroy you? Well, He did.


Inside of you is your healing, your freedom, your greatness, your destiny. Tap into it. On my birthday, I went from the crown of my head to the soles of my feet and wrote down everything I loved about myself. While it took me some time to realize I was worth every ounce of happiness in the world, you can't take that joy and assurance from me. My best friend Sheleda's mom (aka "Mom2 ") told me that I was created from the greatest of the Great which means that greatness also exists in me, too! And it's in you, as well. Whatever has hindered up to this point, I simply ask that you let it go. He gave it to you not to bind you, but to free you. Everything is working for your good. Everything is working for your purpose. Everything is working for your restoration. Everything.

©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: The Cheerleader Parts One and Two (Job)

When God Speaks:"The Cheerleader (Part One): Junior Varsity and Varsity Squad Tryouts"
January 12, 2009



Satan left God and struck Job with terrible sores. Job was ulcers and scabs from head to foot. They itched and oozed so badly that he took a piece of broken pottery to scrape himself, then went and sat on a trash heap, among the ashes. His wife said, "Still holding on to your precious integrity, are you? Curse God and be done with it!" He told her, "You're talking like an empty-headed fool. We take the good days from God—why not also the bad days?" Not once through all this did Job sin. He said nothing against God.- Job 2: 7-10


Quick question: What in the world happened with Job's wife? How do you pledge to spend the rest of your life with the one you love and when trouble comes, you tell them to "curse God and die"? Yea, that's some quality unconditional love right there. I find it no mistake that we were never provided the name of Job's wife in this book. I think sometimes when God doesn't name people in the Scriptures, it's because He would rather us focus on their behaviors and attitudes to learn our lesson than attempting to analyze how their lineage played a part in their character development. We all know a "Job's wife"; she was that day's "Misery loves Company". It was evident that she wasn't happy with herself and consequently, could not encourage Job to seek happiness as well. But when you believe that your life is meant to be shared with someone, in romance or friendship, it is your responsibility to recognize your role as a cheerleader. However, it is our responsibility to appreciate which cheerleader they are supposed to be.

Remember in high school, there were Junior Varsity and Varsity cheerleading squads? Younger girls were on JV and the older young ladies comprised the Varsity team. What does that tell you? Maturity will separate some of us and it is okay. While I wrote this devotional earlier this weekend, its message was confirmed during my pastor's sermon yesterday morning. Everyone that has been in your life up to now may not be able to flow in the direction that you are headed and that's fine; it's actually part of God's plan and design. But if you try to make them fit and flow, you will block your own greatness. Some of us are moving from the Junior Varsity squad and becoming Varsity cheerleaders but not everyone will go with us. Despite how painful it will be, you must keep moving.

I read the entire book of Job several times and found no mention of Job's wife again. Coincidence? I think not. When his fortune was restored, Job's wife was not even named among the celebrators (more of that in Part Two). What does that tell me? Just because you cheered last season doesn't always mean you made this season's squad. Well alright! Friday night, I laid in my bed and asked God for something: "God, no matter how much it may hurt, please reveal those closest to me who do not hold me up in prayer." As I maneuver through this Year of Manifestation and Release (Application and Cultivation), I need a squad that will cheer for me when I'm winning and when it looks like I'm losing. After all, isn't that their purpose anyway?




When God Speaks:"The Cheerleader (Part Two): It's Cheer Competition; Do You Know The Routine?"
January 14, 2009


After God had finished addressing Job, he turned to Eliphaz the Temanite and said, "I've had it with you and your two friends. I'm fed up! You haven't been honest either with me or about me—not the way my friend Job has. So here's what you must do. Take seven bulls and seven rams, and go to my friend Job. Sacrifice a burnt offering on your own behalf. My friend Job will pray for you, and I will accept his prayer. He will ask me not to treat you as you deserve for talking nonsense about me, and for not being honest with me, as he has."They did it. Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite did what God commanded. And God accepted Job's prayer. After Job had interceded for his friends, God restored his fortune—and then doubled it! All his brothers and sisters and friends came to his house and celebrated. They told him how sorry they were, and consoled him for all the trouble God had brought him. Each of them brought generous housewarming gifts. –Job 42: 7- 11


Last week I prayed that God would reveal those friends I have who do not hold me up in prayer. I believe that as people espouse to have a role in the lives of others, the greatest thing we can do is pray. We should pray that their days are bright, their smiles are many and their tears have purpose. We must be there for our friends. That's what Job's friends tried to do…I guess. Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar went to Job (in Chapter Two) as shoulders on which he could cry. But their mistake was incorrectly assessing Job's trouble. The trio insisted that Job's misfortune was due to his sinful nature and in order for peace to be restored, Job needed to repent to God. How sad was it that they really didn't know their friend?

There are many "friends" who will claim to know your problem. You know them- they offer all the wrong advice and, more times than not, they give you the instruction THEY should take. They assume the climate of your condition based upon the temperature of their own. Job's friends and ours fail to appreciate their limitations in this area: you can't fix that which you didn't make. I went to see Bishop TD Jakes' movie, Not Easily Broken, and there was a nugget in there I will never forget: If you want to understand the purpose of a thing, consult the one who created it. A true friend understands that their best weapon of defense and offense in attacking the Enemy, on behalf of their friend, is to talk to the One who created them. After all, only He knows the Who, What, Where, Why and How that will propel us to the next level.

It seems like Job got it. When God was tired of his friends "advising" him, He went off on Job's homies. But what did Job do? He prayed for them. He didn't say "I told you so. Your problem is blah blah blah". He just prayed for them and God knew he would pray for them. There's a beauty in being exactly what God knows you can be. But get this- Job's fortune was restored and doubled after he interceded for his friends. If we are ever to be what we hope to be in life, we must understand the importance of helping other people get there, as well. What good is it that I'm successful, that I'm happy, that I'm free, that I'm loved and I don't pray that my friend is the same?

To all who've prayed me, thank you.

©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: Take What You Need (Esther)

When God Speaks:“Take What You Need”
January 1, 2009



Esther was the daughter of Abihail, who was Mordecai's uncle. (Mordecai had adopted his younger cousin Esther.) When it was Esther's turn to go to the king, she accepted the advice of Hegai, the eunuch in charge of the harem. She asked for nothing except what he suggested, and she was admired by everyone who saw her.–Esther 2: 15

"Pack light."- Erykah Badu

Well….WE MADE IT! Have you thanked Him yet? We are alive in 2009- the year in which, we were told last night, God will manifest more of His greatness in His children and release us into higher levels of destiny and purpose! Are you ready? No, really, are you ready? What I'm wise enough to know is not everyone will "rise, repossess and receive" in this new year. Some people will still allow themselves to remain victims of past disappointments and pain, limiting their own potential and growth. But there are a few of us who left some stuff in 2008 because we refused to allow it to see the dawn of this new mercies filled day.

Though I am well rested, I never really took a "break" because God used some of everything (and everybody) to speak to me- especially with this particular verse. If you're unfamiliar with the story of Hadassah (Esther), she was taken by her cousin to be placed among the women from whom the king would select his next wife. Each woman went through one year of preparation and then spent one night in the king's palace. With them, they could take whatever they believed would assist in wooing him. When it was Esther's turn, she only took what her overseer suggested and was selected as the next queen. When I asked God what He was telling me through this story, simply and softly, I heard: "Candice, in 2009, take what you need and leave everything else." "Okay, but God, what's that?" "The lessons you learned from every trial that came with this year." Yea and Amen!

Leave the hurt but take the lesson. Leave the fear but take the lesson. Leave the embarrassment but take the lesson. Leave the frustration but take the lesson. Leave the anger but take the lesson. Leave the bondage but take the lesson. More and more, I'm learning that what we call pain, God calls purpose (that spoke volumes to me, if no one else). And in this year of manifestation and release, if you are to excel, you cannot continue to wallow in the misery of days gone by. That, as my friend Robert said, would "just be stupid."

I am ready. 2008 came and it is here no more. For that alone, I praise Him. But He's given me this year- the one I've coined as My Year of Application and Cultivation. I will apply the lessons I've learned and will continue to cultivate my purpose and potential. What is this year for you? Allow yourself to "Refine in '09" (Sheleda came up with that one!). Give God the space to manifest His glory and greatness within you. He can't do it if you've crowded it with non-essentials. Or in the words of the new Mary J. Blige Chevrolet commercial that Delishia and I love so: "You've got the space to take everything with you but the wisdom to leave the baggage behind." Well alright!

Happy New Year, Beautiful People! Happy New Year!


©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: Be Happy In Him (Nehemiah)

When God Speaks:“Be Happy In Him”
January 4, 2009



Nehemiah the governor, along with Ezra the priest and scholar and the Levites who were teaching the people, said to all the people, "This day is holy to God, your God. Don't weep and carry on." They said this because all the people were weeping as they heard the words of The Revelation. He continued, "Go home and prepare a feast, holiday food and drink; and share it with those who don't have anything: This day is holy to God. Don't feel bad. The joy of God is your strength!" –Nehemiah 8: 9-10

Have you just thought about the goodness of God? Do you ever think about Him and just smile? He’s that great, you know. Even when we don’t deserve to see another day, we allows us to experience one. When we’re disobedient, He looks past all of that and embraces us with love and unmerited favor. He is just that good.

The Israelites had just finished rebuilding the Wall of Jerusalem and Ezra began to read to law of God. As he read it, the children of Israel began to cry. Nehemiah, Ezra and the Levites told them not to become upset but rejoice in God and His instruction. You, too, must learn how to find joy in everything God does.

Sometimes what He does is painful. Sometimes what He does is confusing. Sometimes what He does can frustrate you. But, because all things work together for our benefit, everything He does will work in our favor. You’re winning. You’re going to always win. What can be better than that?


©BirthRight, 2009

When God Speaks: Let The Work Stop So It Can Begin Again (Ezra)

When God Speaks:"Let The Work Stop So It Can Begin Again"
December 22, 2008


The letter of King Artaxerxes was read to Rehum and Shimshai the secretary and their associates. They lost no time. They went to the Jews in Jerusalem and made them quit work. That put a stop to the work on The Temple of God in Jerusalem. Nothing more was done until the second year of the reign of Darius king of Persia. – Ezra 4: 23- 24

"You better stop and take time before time stop and take you." –My granpa Bud


I sent out an emergency S.O.S. for a girl's night about a month ago; I needed a release. I needed to be honest and free with the ones who loved me enough to let me be just that. Friday finally came. Ten sisterfriends assembled in a living room to update each other on love, life and our own pursuits of happiness. My turn came and I spilled the beans. Amidst all of my girls "telling me like it is" (in love, of course), Courtney spoke the absolute truth: "Candice, you need a sabbatical!" And she was absolutely right.

There are times when circumstances force you to regroup and strategize your next approach. Take for instance this passage and the plight of the children of Israel. They were rebuilding the Temple in Jerusalem and haters came along, attempting to distract them. When God's chosen people refused to falter, their enemies intensified their attack: they went to the king and lied on them. The king, convinced their treason was the truth, ordered a stop to the rebuilding of the Temple. The children of Israel obeyed and no work was done for quite some time.

Because God makes no mistakes, we know that this work cessation was a part of a purpose, bigger than even they could see at the time. I wonder how the Israelites used their break. Did they figure out a more effective way to build the Temple or did they not think about work altogether? Were their days spent with the family and loved ones they didn't get to see while working or did they stay in bed all day, doing nothing? Eventually, the Temple was rebuilt and dedicated back to God; their enemies didn't stop that. God's work doesn't end but sometimes, He gives an opportunity to get alone with Him so He can help us understand the blueprint.

This is the last devotional I will send out this year. A great deal has happened this year and I'm tired. Time and I are going out on a date and I've decided to bring peace and happiness along for the ride. God has been unbelievably good to me and it is my reasonable service to rest and refocus in and with Him. And it's yours, too. We stand at the brink of a new year that possesses an abundance of new possibilities that make life more beautiful and believable. Clarity of the mind and a focused purpose are the absolute best ways to show our appreciation for that.

May this Christmas season strengthen your belief in love, peace, faith and joy. And may the anticipation of the New Year pale in comparison to the anticipation of watching God meet and exceed your every need.

With a big and bright smile on my face,
Candice Marie



©BirthRight, 2008

When God Speaks: Pray For Wisdom (II Chronicles)

When God Speaks:"Pray For Wisdom"
December 16, 2008



That night God appeared to Solomon. God said, "What do you want from me? Ask." Solomon answered, "You were extravagantly generous with David my father, and now you have made me king in his place. Establish, God, the words you spoke to my father, for you've given me a staggering task, ruling this mob of people. Yes, give me wisdom and knowledge as I come and go among this people—for who on his own is capable of leading these, your glorious people?" God answered Solomon, "This is what has come out of your heart: You didn't grasp for money, wealth, fame, and the doom of your enemies; you didn't even ask for a long life. You asked for wisdom and knowledge so you could govern well my people over whom I've made you king. Because of this, you get what you asked for—wisdom and knowledge. And I'm presenting you the rest as a bonus—money, wealth, and fame beyond anything the kings before or after you had or will have." – 2 Chronicles 1: 7-12

We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility for our future.– George Bernard Shaw

I celebrated my 27th birthday this past Thursday. A few days before, I'd read a dynamic Shellie Warren devotional that suggested that we begin to pray for things that are directly related to helping us fulfill our purpose. I took that heart so on Thursday, these were my exact words:

"Dear God,I thank you for allowing me to see another year of life. I ask that you forgive me for the mistakes I was too afraid to ask forgiveness for and grant me the wisdom to walk forward in love, peace and without fear. Give me the wisdom that will enable people to see You in everything I do.Amen."

There's something about a desire for wisdom. It only comes, I believe, when you recognize that the next levels of your life can not be attained through your own efforts and understanding. It's the reality that you can be better than what you were and greater than what you are…with guidance and temperance.

What I love about God is that before He granted Solomon's request, He knew Solomon would still make mistakes. Wisdom isn't synonymous with perfection. Even with the greatest desire for it, you will not dot every "I" and cross every "T". You are human; you have flaws. But the purpose created for you was designed by One who is flawless. If He was wonderful enough to place in you everything you need to accomplish the work, why not depend on Him to help you do it?

Praying for wisdom isn't selfish. It benefits everyone around you. I think that's why God gave Solomon the "extras" that He did. You want money? Pray for wisdom. What good is the money if you don't have discipline in spending it? You want love? Pray for wisdom. You can't really have the BEST relationship if you don't have the BEST intentions, can you? You want success? Pray for wisdom. Without it, how are you sure it won't go to your head? Whatever it is that you want, I'm not saying that if you pray for wisdom you'll get it. But you will get a better understanding on whether you need it or not.

Pray for wisdom.
Pray for wisdom.
Pray for wisdom.


©BirthRight, 2008

When God Speaks: Keyshia Cole Learned Alot From Jabez...And Maybe You Could Too (I Chronicles)

When God Speaks:“Keyshia Cole Learned Alot From Jabez…And Maybe We Could Too”
December 7, 2008



Jabez was more honorable than his brothers. His mother had named him Jabez, saying, "I gave birth to him in pain."Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, "Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain." And God granted his request. – I Chronicles 4:9-10

I came home from church and, thanks to one of my friend’s Facebook status updates, found myself catching up on this season’s episodes of the Keyshia Cole show on BET. For those of you who are not familiar with Lady Cole, she is my generation’s equivalent of Mary J. Blige. Her songs, which mirror her life’s extraordinary experiences, soundtrack the average 20something sistah’s life today. One episode struck a chord with me. Keyshia called her pastor into her home to help heal the rift between her sister and her mother; their relationship, to say the least, is toxic at times. Noticing the burden of “fixing” this particular parent/sibling dyad was weighing heavily on her, Keyshia’s pastor spoke something that resonated with her…and me: “You can’t be wings for everybody.” He told her that just like God had given her the ability to walk into her destiny, He’s able to do the same for them. Keyshia resolved that she’d live her own life, hoping that the opportunities she’d given her family would be enough for them to search for their own healing.

There’s not much said about Jabez but I wonder if that was his attitude, as well. We know his home situation was not the best- his mother named him as a result of the discomfort he brought and his brothers must’ve been just…bad. I wonder what it took to get Jabez to pray a prayer like that. He didn’t think about his mother; he didn’t think about his brothers; he only prayed for himself. Did he keep trying to get his brothers to lead better lives and it just didn’t work? Did he want his mother to move past the pain he’d caused at birth to see what he’d done since then but she refused? Did he just decide that the most effective way to help them was to be the best Jabez he could be?

The beauty of Jabez’s prayer is that God gave him what he asked for. He enlarged his territory and kept His hand on his life. Because I know that Jabez loved God, I know he understood that God didn’t do that just for him; He did it for his mother and his brothers. Keyshia, as well, has been able to provide an opportunity for a better life for her family. But that’s just it- all you can do is provide the opportunity. It’s up to others to take advantage of it. Everyone has their own Jabez prayer to pray.

I turn 27 on Thursday. I was told the greatest gift I could ask for and receive is wisdom. As one who answers every call and responds to every text message, I’m learning that you can’t be everything to everybody. People will lean on you because they’re afraid to stand on their own. You wonder what your responsibility is to them in those situations. It is simply to point out their God-given wings and encourage them to fly; they can use them or not. Either way you’re in the skies, soaring.


©BirthRight, 2008

When God Speaks: Hello My Name Is ___ And I'm A Leper (II Kings)

When God Speaks:“Hello My Name Is _____ And I’m A Leper”
December 5, 2008


The king of Aram had great admiration for Naaman, the commander of his army, because through him the Lord had given Aram great victories. But though Naaman was a mighty warrior, he suffered from leprosy. - II Kings 5:1


I sat my mother down and told her I had something to say. “I want to start my own publishing company.” I said I believe that part of my purpose in life is to help other people find and understand theirs and I’m supposed to do that in unconventional ways. I became excited thinking about this dream and its fruition; and I thought about how, in years prior, I cheated myself out of believing I could do it.

We have things in life that we’re required to accomplish. Unfortunately, we don’t accomplish them because of what we perceive our limitations to be. You know you’re supposed to go forward with the business venture God gave you but you’re afraid that, because you are not the most articulate and intelligent out of the bunch, you will fail. So instead you settle with your success at the mid-level of a pyramid enterprise. You know you’re supposed to help transform lives through the melodies of your voice but you’re not comfortable with being the one seen (simply because you’re not comfortable with yourself). As a result, you’re lending background vocals when you know God called you to be the artist.

Everyone battles something. I remember a time when I doubted how successful I could be because my family structure and my physical appearance didn’t meet society’s criteria. What could a girl, with no daddy and no supermodel frame, have to say to the world? Absolutely everything! Our imperfections don’t hinder our purpose; they add to it. I’m supposed to show, through my work, that you can have one parent and a double digit dress size and leave your mark on this world. You’re supposed to show, through your work, that you don’t have to graduate from Harvard to create the economic infrastructure your community needs. You’re supposed to show, through your work, that you don’t have to be the best in order to be great.

In the chapter, Naaman gets healed from leprosy. Do you know what that means? It means that while God can use your imperfections to perfect His will in your life, a day will come when those imperfections are old news. Let that marinate while you thank Him for how good He is.


©BirthRight, 2008

When God Speaks: When He Filled My Temple (I Kings)

When God Speaks:“When He Filled My Temple”
November 30, 2008

When the priests withdrew from the Holy Place, the cloud filled the temple of the LORD. And the priests could not perform their service because of the cloud, for the glory of the LORD filled his temple. Then Solomon said, "The LORD has said that he would dwell in a dark cloud; I have indeed built a magnificent temple for you, a place for you to dwell forever." – I Kings 8: 10-13

There are times when I have so many questions for God and I want to get the answers in a place where only He can speak to me. I had one of those times, recently. I thought about this year. I asked Him why He took Dimera. I asked Him why my cousin was still being held for a crime everyone knows he didn’t commit. I asked Him why I had been taken to a place to make a difference and uprooted six months later. I asked Him why from my eyes had to flow tears of frustration. I asked Him why people would set out to hurt me because of where He wanted to take me in life. I asked Him why He brought me back to Winston Salem and doesn’t seem like He’s allowing me to leave. I asked Him why He’d call me to help push other people into their purpose and destiny and it was becoming so painful to walk into my own. I asked Him why it seemed that my role was to always be the celebrator and not the celebrated. I laid across my bed, sobbing. There was no longer a need for words. In silence, I communed with God.

The group of people I’ve come to admire most in life, these days, are the worshippers. They recognize that it is important to develop a relationship with God that sustains them. Despite where they are in my life, worship was the one constant. It enables them to articulate their heart beyond just considering their actions. I understand that worship is a lifestyle. You breathe it; it fills your lungs when disappointment has taken all the air out of them. You walk it; it somehow causes your stride to continue when hurt would dare you to move again. You speak it; it becomes the words that fear would attempt to erase. Despite our imperfections, despite our shortcomings, despite our mistakes, despite it all: We are worship and worship is us.

The beauty about true worship is that good can be seen in all things. So I thanked God for this year. I told him that, though I didn’t understand why He took Dimera, I know He makes no mistakes. For that, I thanked Him. I thanked Him because He’s perfecting His work in my cousin through this ordeal. I praised Him for moving me from a place when my assignment was over and people didn’t appreciate Him in me. I honored Him for my tears because for each of them, He gives me strength and wisdom to accept what He allows. I thanked Him for the table He prepares for me in the very presence of my enemies. I told Him I would go wherever He sends me because His will is what I want for my life. I thanked Him for trusting me enough to help people see Him in what they’re called to do. I honored Him for celebrating me by letting me wake up this morning. I laid across my bed, smiling. There was no longer a need for words. In silence, I communed with God.

That’s what happened when He filled my temple. What happened when He filled yours?

©BirthRight, 2008

When God Speaks: Tamar Wants You To Be Thankful (II Samuel)

When God Speaks:“Tamar Wants You To Be Thankful”
November 22, 2008


Some time later, this happened: Absalom, David's son, had a sister who was very attractive. Her name was Tamar. Amnon, also David's son, was in love with her. Amnon was obsessed with his sister Tamar to the point of making himself sick over her. She was a virgin, so he couldn't see how he could get his hands on her. Amnon had a good friend, Jonadab, the son of David's brother Shimeah. Jonadab was exceptionally streetwise. He said to Amnon, "Why are you moping around like this, day after day—you, the son of the king! Tell me what's eating at you." "In a word, Tamar," said Amnon. "My brother Absalom's sister. I'm in love with her." "Here's what you do," said Jonadab. "Go to bed and pretend you're sick. When your father comes to visit you, say, 'Have my sister Tamar come and prepare some supper for me here where I can watch her and she can feed me.'" So Amnon took to his bed and acted sick. When the king came to visit, Amnon said, "Would you do me a favor? Have my sister Tamar come and make some nourishing dumplings here where I can watch her and be fed by her." David sent word to Tamar who was home at the time: "Go to the house of your brother Amnon and prepare a meal for him." So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house. She took dough, kneaded it, formed it into dumplings, and cooked them while he watched from his bed. But when she took the cooking pot and served him, he wouldn't eat. Amnon said, "Clear everyone out of the house," and they all cleared out. Then he said to Tamar, "Bring the food into my bedroom, where we can eat in privacy." She took the nourishing dumplings she had prepared and brought them to her brother Amnon in his bedroom. But when she got ready to feed him, he grabbed her and said, "Come to bed with me, sister!""No, brother!" she said, "Don't hurt me! This kind of thing isn't done in Israel! Don't do this terrible thing! Where could I ever show my face? And you—you'll be out on the street in disgrace. Oh, please! Speak to the king—he'll let you marry me." But he wouldn't listen. Being much stronger than she, he raped her. No sooner had Amnon raped her than he hated her—an immense hatred. The hatred that he felt for her was greater than the love he'd had for her. "Get up," he said, "and get out!" "Oh no, brother," she said. "Please! This is an even worse evil than what you just did to me!" But he wouldn't listen to her. He called for his valet. "Get rid of this woman. Get her out of my sight! And lock the door after her." The valet threw her out and locked the door behind her. - II Samuel 13: 1-18

In just a few days I will be sitting at a table with my uncle’s fried turkey, my grandmother’s pig feet, my mother’s potato salad and I may even make macaroni and cheese. My grandfather’s baby sister, Aunt Truselle, will shower me with kisses and I will revert back to a five year old loving every minute of it. I will be asked the usual sarcastic questions by my cousins (“When do you plan to finish school and get a real job?” and “When are you going to start dating somebody?”) and I will respond with the usual sarcastic answers (“When I’m finished.” and “Umm-none of your business.”). I will find one of my grandfather’s old Crown Royal bags, fill it with pennies and play Pokeno- since I am now officially old enough. I will go outside and “ring around the rosie” with the littlest of our clan- since you’re never too old to do that. I will call Ashley to see how those cornish hens turned out and text Kiel to find out how they do Turkey Day in the Hamptons. When we go around the table and say what we are thankful for, I will say that I am most thankful for maturing to the place where I don’t wait until the fourth Thursday of November to express gratitude for those things that mean so much.

But not far from my thoughts will be the over 10 million people in the United States of America who are without jobs; their tables may not be as full as mine. My mind will go to the children of the more than 2 million divorced families who will have to split their time between two homes. In my prayers will be the millions of families who no longer have their homes. What will this Thanksgiving look like for them? Will they recognize that, despite it all, God is still deserving of the praise? If she could, what would Tamar tell those less fortunate in our country today? Would she want them to wallow in their circumstances or look for the beauty in them? Could it be possible that Tamar would say that God still had a purpose and destiny for her, even though her life was turned upside down? Would she encourage those weak in spirit to look for God’s purpose in their trials, knowing that finding it would make them stronger?

These are trying times; more tears are present than smiles. Belief has been replaced with doubt. There seems to be more lack than gain. How do we celebrate? How do we offer thanksgiving? We offer it by recognizing that it truly could have been worse. Yes, you took a pay cut. But they could’ve cut your job. Yes, you lost your job. But you could have lost your mind. They may have taken your house but someone could have taken your life. It could always be worse. We may not be situated in the circumstances that we think we should be right now. But where we are is in a place that causes us to appreciate that God spared us. He’s still sparing us. He will continue to spare us. That’s His promise. He is our Father. We are His children. That, in itself, is enough to make anybody thankful.

Thank you. Happy Thanksgiving!

When God Speaks: Manchild In The Promised Land (I Samuel)

When God Speaks:“Manchild in the Promised Land (Why Men Should Know You Recognize And Respect Their Greatness)”
November 16, 2008

Crushed in soul, Hannah prayed to God and cried and cried—inconsolably. Then she made a vow: Oh, God-of-the-Angel-Armies, If you'll take a good, hard look at my pain, If you'll quit neglecting me and go into action for me by giving me a son, I'll give him completely, unreservedly to you. I'll set him apart for a life of holy discipline… Before the year was out, Hannah had conceived and given birth to a son. She named him Samuel, explaining, "I asked God for him." Then God called out, "Samuel, Samuel!" Samuel answered, "Yes? I'm here." Then he ran to Eli saying, "I heard you call. Here I am." Eli said, "I didn't call you. Go back to bed." And so he did. God called again, "Samuel, Samuel!" Samuel got up and went to Eli, "I heard you call. Here I am." Again Eli said, "Son, I didn't call you. Go back to bed." (This all happened before Samuel knew God for himself. It was before the revelation of God had been given to him personally.) God called again, "Samuel!"—the third time! Yet again Samuel got up and went to Eli, "Yes? I heard you call me. Here I am." That's when it dawned on Eli that God was calling the boy. So Eli directed Samuel, "Go back and lie down. If the voice calls again, say, 'Speak, God. I'm your servant, ready to listen.'" Samuel returned to his bed. Then God came and stood before him exactly as before, calling out, "Samuel! Samuel!" Samuel answered, "Speak. I'm your servant, ready to listen." God said to Samuel, "Listen carefully. I'm getting ready to do something in Israel that is going to shake everyone up and get their attention. – 1 Samuel 1 10-11 and 20, 3: 8-11

Someone asked me if I “was stranded on a desert island and could only have books, which ones would I take?” As the owner of over 200 books (I was the girl that never sold hers back in undergrad), I only need a few to survive and I Samuel is on that list. From Hannah’s sincere petition to God for a child to Samuel’s illustration of godly counsel to David and Johnathan’s portrayal of healthy friendships, I believe this book provides necessary lessons on how to navigate effectively through life. And today, another one was revealed.

I have a number of wonderful young men in my life. They encourage me. They check me when I’m wrong. They make me happy to have them in my life. They are attorneys, account executives, teachers, scholars, blue collar workers, loving husbands, dedicated fathers and amazing men. They are my cousins and they are my very best friends. They see where I’m trying to go and do whatever they can to help me get there. I, in turn, try to do the same. But I recognize the road for them is not an easy one. Despite our next president being an African-American man, the brothers in our lives still function in a world that would purpose to squelch their dreams and aspirations. I recognize that it is just as important for me to feed their spirit and nurture their potential as it is for them to inspire me to higher heights.

And maybe even more so. I’ve heard it said that women maintain the standard for society but it is the men who set it. If this is true, in order for a standard to be set in which all of us can benefit, our men must believe they have the power to ordain it to be so. Could this be why Hannah felt it imperative that young Samuel be raised in the temple? Did she realize the potential for greatness her son had and, consequently, wanted him in an environment that would endorse it? Then it hit me and I wondered: how many men really are encouraged to cultivate the gift inside of them? Do we just say they should go to church for going to church’s sake or because it’s integral to their growth and development? Do we insist they go to school just because everyone else did or because it will help propel them to their next level? Do we listen to them or believe they should always be the listeners? Do we respect their fears or resolve that real men don’t have any? Do we believe in them and do they know it? Samuel had a mother that prayed for him and a father that understood his son was not his to raise. When Samuel received his call from God, it wasn’t his father that helped him understand it; it was Eli- the man who raised him. We never know what man, young or old, we are supposed to be Eli for. But when the opportunity comes, we have to seize it. Samuel was able to anoint Israel’s kings and help lay the path from which Christ would come. What will the men in your life do as a result of your encouragement and belief?

The more I think about it, I need the men in my life to be in line. They help me stay in line. I need Jamon to take from studying to pray with and over me. I need my cousin Daniel to send me an “I’m proud of you” text message. I need Kiel and Jamaal to say “I love you but no real man is going to buy you a $30,000 engagement ring so you need to prepare for another purpose” when I become entranced by that particular Tiffany & Company creation. I need them to achieve every dream they have for their lives because it gives me hope. It gives me hope that future generations of men will settle for nothing less than operating at their highest levels of potential. And I will do everything I can to ensure that; will you?

To every man with which I’m blessed to share heritage, friendship, conversation, emails and this great place we call Earth: if no one told you today, let me be the first to say: You are wonderful. You are full of promise. You are a King. You are needed.

©BirthRight, 2008